I think I'm dying...
... Okay. No, not really. (insert dry laugh here)
I'm just sick with some kind of illness and I'm extremely tired. I've been studying straight through and didn't even notice the time.
OY! BEEN A WHILE SINCE AN UPDATE! I know... har!
So. Brief summary of my life?
Had to see 2 psychiatrists (1 nutritionist, 1 mental health lady-person) for a wee bit. Blah blah blah. Stopped.
Homicidal towards my roommate. Wait till I get a weapon and am PMSing and have had a bad day. WEE!
Cut my hair shoulder length and intend to cut it even shorter in due time.
Got my left cartilage pierced and may probably get another part of the left ear pierced as well or my right cartilage this coming Friday.
Relationship is rocky at times, but often fine.
Fuckin PRATIMA facebook'd me tonight - which is bizarre and just outlandishly AWESOME. Can't wait to talk to her.
Mom had her brain surgery - she is fine. Just bloaty, tired, a little achey and it makes me cry to see her in that kind of condition. Dad is okay - but sick as per usual which makes me sad.
I'm back on my less than 1200 calories per day diet - meaning yes, clinically - I am anorexic. FUCK YOU if you have an issue with it - why? For several reasons. A. I still wear a size 7-9 (pending on what brand). B. My boyfriend weighs LESS than 10 lbs. more than I do which irritates me beyond belief - and no I will not "change". C. I have low self esteem to begin with so eh - bite me.
Massive amounts of dorm-drama seems to be pouring in.
I realize how fleeting my friendships are and how undependable the new friendships I've made have become. I got ditched, duped and talked shit about my almost fucking everyone here - thanks for NOTHING.
I've got 2 HUGE fucking exams this week that I've barely studied for.
Ah. Yes. And I'm PLAGUED with utterly ridiculous and quite HORRIBLE nightmares.
Other than that, I'm fine - peachy - vunderbar - and all that good wholesome sugary stuff.
Upcoming?
Probably goto mall with my peoples and get something pierced this Friday. We'll see. Kinda broke at this present moment in time.
Voorhees Ball - I don't think I really want to go anymore... cuz I just fucking don't.
1st Anniversary with boyfriend - Sadly, I'm NOT excited because I don't want to be the only one excited about it. I see it like I see my birthday currently. It's just another day. (and no, I'm not mopey and sad about this.)
Spring Break - NOTHING TO DO. Why? No one wants to take time out to chill. No one wants to do didly squat. Friends from RP have school, moved or have been banned out of my life.
Summer Vacay - Going to watch Star Wars with my brother and dad and mom probably. Beans said she'd come up with some RU people to watch Willy Winka (Depp Style) and chill around North Jersey for a day.
That's about it for now, yes?
No. No one should take the tone of this entry as particularily negative - more so, nonchalant. I'm too tired to consider emotion or being upset - and NO. Even if I wasn't tired, I'd still be absolutely uncaring and nonchalant about my outlook on certain things. Sorry if I'm not the peppy little optimist at this point in time in my life. I'd like to be a neutralist for a while. Why? LESS DISAPPOINTMENT.
And final note? Sabrina (i know you'll see this at some point) - You made a good decision. You guys tried and it didn't work. You can't complete and work a relationship with someone you can't trust unless they work towards wanting to gain that trust back.
HAR. I'm a hypocrite. Don't worry about it. I usually don't take my own advice - it'll be the end of me, I know - but shut up and listen to me, k? lol-
All in all - do what makes you happiest... and healthiest. You get physically sick for a lot of stuff... it scares me. You need a stomach transplant - not mine though. Well, maybe. I could go without a stomach. :)
NIGHT!
I'm just sick with some kind of illness and I'm extremely tired. I've been studying straight through and didn't even notice the time.
OY! BEEN A WHILE SINCE AN UPDATE! I know... har!
So. Brief summary of my life?
Had to see 2 psychiatrists (1 nutritionist, 1 mental health lady-person) for a wee bit. Blah blah blah. Stopped.
Homicidal towards my roommate. Wait till I get a weapon and am PMSing and have had a bad day. WEE!
Cut my hair shoulder length and intend to cut it even shorter in due time.
Got my left cartilage pierced and may probably get another part of the left ear pierced as well or my right cartilage this coming Friday.
Relationship is rocky at times, but often fine.
Fuckin PRATIMA facebook'd me tonight - which is bizarre and just outlandishly AWESOME. Can't wait to talk to her.
Mom had her brain surgery - she is fine. Just bloaty, tired, a little achey and it makes me cry to see her in that kind of condition. Dad is okay - but sick as per usual which makes me sad.
I'm back on my less than 1200 calories per day diet - meaning yes, clinically - I am anorexic. FUCK YOU if you have an issue with it - why? For several reasons. A. I still wear a size 7-9 (pending on what brand). B. My boyfriend weighs LESS than 10 lbs. more than I do which irritates me beyond belief - and no I will not "change". C. I have low self esteem to begin with so eh - bite me.
Massive amounts of dorm-drama seems to be pouring in.
I realize how fleeting my friendships are and how undependable the new friendships I've made have become. I got ditched, duped and talked shit about my almost fucking everyone here - thanks for NOTHING.
I've got 2 HUGE fucking exams this week that I've barely studied for.
Ah. Yes. And I'm PLAGUED with utterly ridiculous and quite HORRIBLE nightmares.
Other than that, I'm fine - peachy - vunderbar - and all that good wholesome sugary stuff.
Upcoming?
Probably goto mall with my peoples and get something pierced this Friday. We'll see. Kinda broke at this present moment in time.
Voorhees Ball - I don't think I really want to go anymore... cuz I just fucking don't.
1st Anniversary with boyfriend - Sadly, I'm NOT excited because I don't want to be the only one excited about it. I see it like I see my birthday currently. It's just another day. (and no, I'm not mopey and sad about this.)
Spring Break - NOTHING TO DO. Why? No one wants to take time out to chill. No one wants to do didly squat. Friends from RP have school, moved or have been banned out of my life.
Summer Vacay - Going to watch Star Wars with my brother and dad and mom probably. Beans said she'd come up with some RU people to watch Willy Winka (Depp Style) and chill around North Jersey for a day.
That's about it for now, yes?
No. No one should take the tone of this entry as particularily negative - more so, nonchalant. I'm too tired to consider emotion or being upset - and NO. Even if I wasn't tired, I'd still be absolutely uncaring and nonchalant about my outlook on certain things. Sorry if I'm not the peppy little optimist at this point in time in my life. I'd like to be a neutralist for a while. Why? LESS DISAPPOINTMENT.
And final note? Sabrina (i know you'll see this at some point) - You made a good decision. You guys tried and it didn't work. You can't complete and work a relationship with someone you can't trust unless they work towards wanting to gain that trust back.
HAR. I'm a hypocrite. Don't worry about it. I usually don't take my own advice - it'll be the end of me, I know - but shut up and listen to me, k? lol-
All in all - do what makes you happiest... and healthiest. You get physically sick for a lot of stuff... it scares me. You need a stomach transplant - not mine though. Well, maybe. I could go without a stomach. :)
NIGHT!
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